12 OctBuilding Emotional Literacy
How a simple change in our language can empower children
Emotions can be big and overwhelming for little ones, actually they can be big and overwhelming for all of us! But the truth is, our emotions can be part of our wisdom, giving us information to help us to live well. It all comes down to how we relate to our emotions.
One tip to help us and our children to manage our emotions more effectively, is a simple change in our language. Typically, we might say “I am angry” or “I am sad”, when we do this, we are letting the emotion takeover our whole being – we become angry or sad and we lose sight of the fact that we are so much more than just this emotion. Instead, we might say “I am feeling anger” or “I am feeling sadness”, when we do this, it is very clear that we are the “I” that is having the feeling – they are two separate things. With this simple change in language, we have created a space between our emotions and ourselves.
From this standpoint we might even allow ourselves and encourage our children to become really curious about the emotion. This is the heart of emotional literacy, before we can clearly express how we are feeling, we need to learn how to tune in to cues in our body. We might use prompts such as:
- Where do you feel it in your body?
- What do you think the emotion is telling you?
- What might you like to say to this emotion?
These can be helpful prompts to explore before or after a time of big emotional overwhelm. Neuroscience tells is that when we are ‘caught’ in an emotional response, without practice it is really hard to think rationally, we actually lose access to the rational part of our brain! Another tool that can support all of us to manage our emotions (and thoughts) more effectively is mindfulness meditation. When we meditate, we are encouraged to curiously observe the passing and ever changing nature of thoughts and emotions, which can enable us to respond more skillfully in our everyday lives, if and when we are face with big emotions. And, let’s face it, emotions come with being human, so we are well-placed to learn how to turn these into our superpower, rather than let them overwhelm us too often.
Liv Downing works as a registered psychologist, meditation teacher and mindfulness educator. Over her career she has developed programs for Smiling Mind, Beyond Blue and The Resilience Project, among others. Currently she works in private practice psychotherapy, teaches at Monash University in the medical faculty, offers mindfulness workshops to organisations and schools, has developed a workplace mental health program called The Mind You Program and hosts a podcast about connection and belonging called You are Loved, which is also the title of her first children’s book published by Allen and Unwin in October 2022. Liv’s website is www.livmindfully.com and social media handle is @livmindfully
YOU ARE LOVED is a celebration of the unconditional nature of love. It’s rhyming words and colorful illustrations, coupled with a wonderful cut-out heart that changes shape each time a page is turned will captivate and educate young and older readers alike. Liv had developed a free educator’s resource to compliment this book covering areas such as: emotional literacy, embodied awareness, curiosity, unconditional love, self-regulation, meditation and the English language. Download the resource here
If you are interested in purchasing You Are Loved you can do so by CLICKING HERE
